New Year’s Resolutions and 2017 Doll Goals

So 2017 is here. I always expect to feel different at the start of a new year, but I often never do. I think 2017 is another defining year for me, as i’m five months into living in a new state, I may be out of a job in a couple of weeks (still temping at the same place, hoping they’ll keep me on), and it’s the first time I’m starting a new year so far from home. I also think that since I expect to make California my new permanent home, my doll collection is kind of getting out of control…

Anyway, here are my resolutions:

  1. Lose some weight. I’m having trouble fitting into my clothes 😥 . I’m going to limit eating out to once a week.
  2. Save up for a condo or a house. XD This is kind of a lofty goal. I want to own my own place sometime in my 30s (WHICH IS SOON D: OMG). I know the real estate market for buyers is kind of crap right now, but it doesn’t hurt to start saving.
  3. Form good habits – exercising, journaling, meditating, relaxing… you know…

Here are my dolly goals:

  1. The next blythe I buy will be a new release with pink hair. NO EXCEPTIONS SELF.
  2. Own a 1st Gen Licca Repro.
  3. Maybe add a Jerry Berry to the family.

My doll collection currently has no pink haired girls! I went from 2 to none last year. If I’m going to buy a new blythe, she WILL have pink hair.

I’m also finding that I’m obsessing over painted faces (in particular, eyes). The Jerry Berry’s proportions are kind of similar to blythes (they can share the same clothes, and they also have big heads). The Jerry Berrys’ eyes are so dreamy. I also want a 1st gen Licca chan – I love her almond shaped eyes!

I think having goals like this will help me spend my money more smartly, as opposed to all willy-nilly, must buy all the things (like i’ve been doing this past month).

I hope everyone is having a great start to the new year :3.

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Just words

I’m still mid-slump, and the fact that things keep changing doesn’t help either. I haven’t been doing any hobby things lately, as I’ve been too busy vegetating and watching Buffy the Vampire Slayer on Netflix (omg I didn’t realize how funny 90’s slang and fashion were haha. Did I really dress like that???). 

I’m still working temp jobs, but I think I finally found an apartment that I can call home for a year! This means: I get to set up my dolls. I will start crafting again! I will finally be able to go get my cat back on the east coast. 

Renting a room in someone else’s house was (is?) an experience. I’ve never subsisted on frozen dinner and cup ramen before, and also, I now appreciate just how clean my parents’ home is, and how much work it is to keep a house that clean. My dollies are all in a box right now, including my newest girl, who I’m waiting to send over to Australia for a makeover once I save up enough (teh monies… It slips through my fingers). Money has been stressing me out, moreso than it used to – I’ve never had to live paycheck-to-paycheck before – it’s mentally exhausting, and super triggering to my anxiety.

And now, I have to think about furnishing my new place! This is both exciting and stressful since furniture is SO EXPENSIVE. I’ve picked out a color palette though!


Mint, gold, grey, and white! I found those photos via Google a la Pinterest ^^. My new place is going to be super tiny, but having a space that’s all mine will do me good, I think. 

Anyway, sorry in advance if I go quiet >_<. 

Displaced in Paradise

Just a rambly (quite possibly long) update. It’s been a whole week since I moved westward, and I’m not sure the reality of the changes has hit me yet. My brain tends to put a negative spin on everything (a bad habit I’m trying to correct), and try as I might, I can’t shake off these thoughts:

  1. I’m technically homeless.
  2. I’m unemployed.
  3. The money… It slips through my fingers (insert Mulan reference here).
  4. I miss my cat.
  5. I’m no longer in NYC.

I’m a New Yorker in California… Which, I guess isn’t all that rare – people relocate all the time. I think I still might be on New York time, as I woke up at 7AM naturally. I went for a walk, and it feels kind of like a waking dream. There’s hummingbirds and bunnies just going about their business in the neighborhood. 

It really does feel surreal. Everything feels different – even my sweat feels different (it was explained to me that this is because there’s no humidity here. Bizarre).

I’m really glad I decided to see my old therapist before leaving everything I knew. She really helped me keep grounded before the move, and I try to remember her words and practice her advice every day I’m here. Here’s my list of positives:

  1. It’s so beautiful here. It’s so serene.
  2. I feel less like I’m being smothered by a sea of angry people.
  3. I have a support system here.
  4. I have a support system in NYC too.


I haven’t been able to do many doll things while here. I think it’s because if I’m not trying to get my life in order, I’m napping because I’m exhausted. Once I get settled (hopefully soon), I’ll be able to take my girls out for some photos.

Ch-ch-changes

I’m currently in mild procrastination mode, starting my new life on the other side of the country. It’s weird being in California, since I’ve lived in NYC my whole life. It still hasn’t hit me yet that this is my new home. Everything is so foreign – the layout of the streets, the lack of the hustle and bustle, the weather…

I tried to bring as much of my home with me, but only managed to bring two dolls – Prisma and Remi. 😦 Marina and Finley couldn’t make the trip this time around, but once I’m settled (and no longer technically homeless), I will most likely have them shipped to me. 

I think another comforting thing about my dolls and this hobby is that I can always depend on my girls to never change. They’re sort of a constant in my every day life. I started to feel a big overwhelmed yesterday night, so I decided to just redress Remington for fun.


Remington is wearing a sweater I knitted, a minijijo tutu, and her stock shoes (which, fun fact, have magnets on the bottom!). 

I intend to redress Prisma tonight… And maybe hopefully take these two girls out for some photos. 

Back to work 😦 .

Slowly packing up my life

It’s weird, but I feel like my move is kind of the start of a new chapter in the story of my life (lol I couldn’t think of a better way to phrase it). I actually haven’t started packing, as I kind of dread the idea of sifting through my things and figuring out whether it’s coming with me or staying behind. 

The one decision that I made that will haunt me is the fact that I will be leaving my cat behind with family, until I have reached some form of stability in my new surroundings. I love my cat – she’s my baby. I know coming back for her after I’ve settled down is the responsible choice for me and for her, but it’s gutting to think I won’t see her for a couple of months at least. I also worry that she will be taken care of properly. I worry a lot. About everything. All the time. 

On a lighter note, I also feel sad leaving some of my dolls behind. (Of course, they will be shipped to me at a later time.) I’ve decided to bring my three custom girls with me, I guess for the fact that they are more fragile than my stock girls, and they are also a bit more fun to photograph, since they have such different expressions from one another. 

They’re also quite comforting to me… I think it’s because Finley was my first Blythe, who I’ve been through a lot of firsts with, and Marina and Prisma were gifts from very dear friends whom I connected with through the hobby (so they’re kind of like my good luck charms). 

I will miss having Reese and Elowyn around for the time being… Which is why I’m bringing these two girls to the next Blythe meet I’m attending this weekend!


I won’t be keeping her in this outfit for the meet, but I thought Reese looked quite cute in her blue and orange ensemble, and I wanted to share ^^.

Ah… Life is nerve-wracking and time just kind of flies by. As it was, I kind of felt like most of the past few years of my life were spent in continuous black and white accompanied by white noise and the sound of my own anxiety. When I think about the alternative of spending any more years like this – stagnant, living within the same 10 mile radius I was born, spending most of my time at a job that seems like a waste of time, just kind of hoping that things would change or get better without me having to do anything, I realize I’m making the best choice for me by making changes in my life. 

I hope to keep updating my blog regularly during my transition… But know that if I disappear for a bit, it will not be for long! 

Weekend rituals and life in general

Every weekend, I try to redress my dolls, that way I can figure out what items in the doll wardrobe I love, get a better sense of what things go together, and it’s quite relaxing to redress them while sipping a glass of wine and watching some YouTube videos. 

Prisma (left) and Finley (right) are this week’s best dressed girls ^^. Prisma is wearing a checkered shirt and tutu by MINIJIJO with a pink hair clip. Finley is wearing an adorable shirt made by my friend, a Missblythe2012 jumper skirt and Qmagicdoll shoes. I love how different these two girls look! They were both customized by different artists, and so their faces are quite different styles. I’m so in love with Prisma, but somewhere down the line, I may give her a licca body (her neck wobbles on her current body, so I’m not sure that I would want to do an arm transplant).

I’m slowly decluttering my things in order to move with less. I do foresee myself having to leave some Blythes and coming back for them later or having them mailed to me, but it’s so hard for me to choose who to bring.

Now that the move date is less than a month, my anxiety has kicked up to over level 9000. The less time between me and my move, the less I feel prepared, and the more real the changes feel. I’m scared… Because change is terrifying. But I see it as having to choose between staying in my current city and living with depression, or relocating and dealing with anxiety. Staying feels like giving up (just because sameness is easier), and I don’t want to give up. I want to someday be happy, and I don’t think that where I’m living right now will lead me there. 


Lol. Check out my Fitbit. This is my heart rate as I sit in my chair, panicking (for reference, my resting heart rate is 63 bpm). 

The one thing that’s changed for me though, is that I’m also feeling bouts of excitement mixed in with the periodic worry. I think I know that in the future, I will be glad that I’ve taken a risk in my life, after playing it safe for so long.

I hope everyone had a great weekend! 

Happiness in simple things 


So I’m torn between naming this new girl:

  1. Kenzie
  2. Hadley
  3. Prisma

She’s so delicate looking. I’m not sure any of these names will fit, because when I look at her, these names don’t come to mind (except Prisma, for some reason… But it’s such a oddball name, and also the name of a villain in Sailor Moon). I guess I’ll think some more (way open to suggestions!!… help…).

I’m in a weird funk right now, I think because big changes are coming my way and fast. I know that a lot of my negativity stems from my anxiety, but I can’t turn it off or shake it off. I try to take a day by day approach to life, and do the best I can today so that I might be better prepared tomorrow, but sometimes my “best” doesn’t seem good enough. Even as we speak, despite being thrilled to have this beautiful new Blythe in my collection, I’m worried about safely transporting her with me during my move. Yeah… I’m feeling weird.

Also one more thing! I finally got around to knitting with the hand dyed yarn I purchased off of etsy, and it’s so beautiful~~~~


I’m completely in love with this color way. It’s well on its way to becoming a shawl ^^.